When I first arrived to Patong by way of an airport shuttle, I saw a female motorcyclist with a shirt that read, “Good men go to heaven. Bad men go to Patong.”
The workers are trying to get you into their bars and strip clubs.
You’ll see signs for discounted beers at 70 baht or two-for-one specials.
Then there’s the heaps of strip clubs or commonly known as ping pong shows.
Why are they called ping pong shows? Apparently, the Thai women put a ping pong into their vagina and shoot it across the room. I even heard of them doing this to a banana.
And in one (or more) extreme case, they’ll put a bird and let it fly out of the woman’s vagina. I don’t know if this is true, but just what some guy told me that I shared an airport shuttle with. This might take animal cruelty to the next level.
This is the notorious Bangla Road I’m talking about in Patong, Phuket, Thailand.
I only came to the Phuket region because it was one of the cheapest flights out of Sydney, Australia, to Southeast Asia.
The strip along Bangla Road is just a regular road with bars, restaurants, tattoo shops, and strip clubs during the day. The traffic passes along just like any other road in Thailand.
Bangla road leads to the police station and Patong Beach. The super touristy beach is jammed with sun dwellers, merchants, on-the-sand Thai massage huts, and people offering parasailing and jet skiing services.
When Patong Beach’s movie-like sunset kicks in, Bangla Road becomes a whore of an entertainment hub.
This is a place to party. Most people enjoyed their time on Bangla Road from what I observed. Of course, a little alcohol helps.
But for me, there is an overwhelming amount of Thai ladyboys offering services or companionship which I wasn’t interested in.
Yes, they call themselves ladyboys in this part of the world, even on Tinder. They are medically known as transsexuals or the politically correct term is transgender. Forgive me if I have my words wrong.
I walked from my hostel to Bangla Road and there are several shops offering Thai messages; some with happy endings.
The women at these parlours would call you out or touch your arm as you walk by. I wasn’t always 100% certain if it was a woman or ladyboy touching my arm as I walked by.
Everyone’s entitled to be who they want to be. But the overwhelming amount of ladyboy harassment is unreal in Patong and especially in and around Bangla Road. But there’s a market for this.
And it’s very difficult to tell if a woman was born a female or male in Patong. Some of the Thai ladyboys look like models.
A guy at my hostel, who I made friends with, told me his story.
“I met a woman last night and brought her back to a different hostel. I found out she was a ladyboy and asked her to leave. The ladyboy went crazy and hit me (there were scars on his face). She also wanted 1000 baht. I was able to kick her out of the room but she damaged the door before she left – with my wallet. The owner found out about the damage the same night. I ended up ditching the hostel in the early morning and came to this one.”
My friend was drunk when he had his ladyboy experience. So, don’t drink and pick up.
Patong wasn’t my type of an exotic location. I was happy to leave after three nights – to Chiang Mai.